Sheri
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Reflecting on my personal experience in threshold takes me back to the fishbowl in Gunnison. The feeling I had as nature communicated the answer I was seeking in those moments is not hard to get back to, I can go back in my minds eye and picture the surrounding scene quite clearly as the A-HA moment was so impactful. Quite certain I could return there today and take you to the exact spot I was standing in. Almost like it froze in time, or maybe more like I woke to a realization with a spark, a light bulb moment! An aspect of that feeling and the ability to experience it was due to the state I was in, nearly a dream or euphoric state. A state of oneness, openness, in a way, vulnerable to the answers I was seeking. I trusted my coach, felt I was being held in a safe container by her and by nature. I was open to guidance and clear on what I was seeking guidance for, thankful for the work – sometimes difficult – in severance. I was connected to self and source allowing the communication to come through nature. As Michael says in recording 29, 23:10 from Foundations, “So how does nature play into this whole thing? When you are in a searching mode, your inner world becomes reflected in the environment that you’re in.” All playing a part in allowing that magical moment to happen!
What is this telling me about coaching others? How important building trust and having that safe space to hold the client in during threshold so they are open to their vulnerability. Helping them to stay focused in their center / soul / heart space verses their head or mental space. Asking those what and how questions, plus feelings and emotions vs thoughts. There may be need to assist the client in learning how to connect at their center. Tools we have been learning to help walk them to that space, like the 7 steps, as well as, tools that teach self-awareness. It may take time to learn how to connect with their true self. Patience and meeting them where they are at is important. Establishing the trust for the sense of security needed to open to the vulnerability to step beyond the ego and connect with the true self for the soul-direction found in threshold.
I also am reminded how important it is for me to be consistent in my own self awareness / nature connection practices. So that I am better attuned to nature and soul for the direction I need to provide guidance in working with my clients. In this state, I am better able to step into the 50/50 plan, faith that nature will show up and provide through our connection during threshold. I am still struggling with how to enter this threshold space over the zoom or phone calls. I am sure with experience this will become more clear to me.
What ICF core competencies are essential? As I got looking I began to wonder if this was a trick question? My digging into the competencies led me to see just how relevant and important they all are in setting us up for successful nature connected coaching!
It starts in the beginning, with the first of our ICF competencies: Setting the Foundation. How we show up, how we set our intention in our commitment to coaching ethically, laying a foundation in trust through agreeing on appropriate boundaries in the coaching client relationship, including the confidentiality agreement. Continuing into the next competency: Co-Creating the Relationship, as this is where trust is established and the safe supportive environment is created. Again, our intention we bring combined with our coaching presence, when entering the relationship is crucial in establishing that trust and secure feeling to be open and enter deeper into connection. We continue to build on the trust the client needs to feel safe within the container we hold for them through the next competency of Communicating Effectively, as all these skills of active listening, powerful questioning and direct communication add to that honest and caring connection we wish to build with them. Providing them comfort and confidence in going deeper in their self awareness and listening to the pull. The final ICF Competency of Facilitating Learning and Results takes us right into the threshold. Creating awareness, self awareness and awareness of connection with you and with nature. Along with designing actions, being on the same page with the steps you will take in the threshold.
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Ecopsychology, the scientific study of our psyche (the human soul, mind or spirit) in nature, is a tool for us, as Nature Connected Coaches, that brings to light the importance and urgency behind our work. It can also help guide us in proven or tested techniques. Having scientific facts to stand upon brings credibility to what we are attempting to achieve through connecting clients, and self, with nature. I really stepped outside and not only dug in, but printed and am really chewing my way through the supplemental reading, The Transpersonal Dimensions of Ecopsychology: Nature, Nonduality and Spiritual Practice by John Davis. I think it was the “nonduality and spiritual practice” that sucked me in. It is taking some time as it is deep and long, and did I say deep? But I am really loving it at the same time, in little bites. I LOVE the last sentence: “Time now to walk among some trees and maybe lay on the ground for awhile.” I actually defaulted to eating icecream while reading for a bit today. Felt the need for something comforting, chocolate with peanut butter, yum! I will try the feet in the grass next time as this one is going to need re-reading over time to get all the good stuff out!
The chapters in both Coaching Skills (Rogers) and Coyote’s Guide (Young, Haas & McGown) expanded my knowledge of appropriate language usage as a coach, for instance the reasoning behind asking what and how questions vs. why questions; and the importance of storytelling and curiosity like that of a child. Storytelling is a practice I will need to work on but I have started journaling much more than in the past, finding it a way to put my thoughts to poetry or a story, so I feel this is progress along these lines. Also finding my journaling is increasing my curiosity as often I am writing in questions – upon questions. Wondering as I wander, without really needing the answers but letting them lead me to a new level of questioning. Touching into that nonduality.
Along with the above readings guiding my practices and building skills, the webinar brought clarity to my vision and insight to some areas I had concerns with. I was wondering how to know when to refer a client to someone who is better suited to meet specific needs beyond my scope of training. The conversation on the call was great. Amazing how open, clear and honest communication can solve many issues. The chart showing interest vs need and the coach-ability of a client really brought understanding to how to better identify where a client is along that coach-able cone, or outside of it, and again how open, clear and honest conversation can help in confirm needs. The What and Who am I committed to slides added to my vision. I am committed to walking with others so they know they are not alone. Those who are open to getting comfortable with the uncomfortable, working on and in the struggle while seeking their truth in being.
I have also stepped outside my comfort zone taking action on and exploring some ideas I have had, to support, or include in my coaching business. This exploration in an open minded vision focused state is bringing new options, expanding my horizons, which I would not have come to, at least not at this early point of my business development had I not still been open to the vastness of vision. I have conversed with a Naturopath in Frisco about visiting monthly or weekly for appointments with clients, the details were not discussed yet but seeds planted and supported! I reconnected with an organization I had been introduced to over a year ago, Walk2Connect, I had thoughts then that it was a fit for me but that was before I got in touch with my vision. After attending a walk today, connecting with the walk leader, Maria Rosas (who will be looking more into EBI and NCC herself!) I am certain there is a fit here and have applied to go through their training program. How could Walk2Connect not be a fit for a Nature Connected Coach whose role in our Earth community is walking with others to bring awareness, balance and connection?
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As I am understanding it ecopsychology is the study (ology) of our mental state (psyche) in our physical space or “home” (eco). Coaching is guiding the client to greater self-awareness (internal and external) to maximize their potential. The two, ecopsychology and coaching, blend in awareness of both psyche and nature, and how each impacts the other. “Ecotherapy (applied ecopsychology) refers to healing and growth nurtured by healthy interactions with the earth.” – Psyche and Nature in a Circle of Healing. Ecopsychology supports my coaching vision of walking with others through the nature of their mental state to heal and grow in self-awareness, learning how to live into their fullest expression.
The following quote grabbed me as I felt this strongly following our immersion in nature during our Foundations Intensive. From Psyche and Nature in a Circle of Healing, “Heartfelt ways to reimagine our responsibilities to this world, to it’s creatures and elements, to ourselves, and to each other will require approaches to healing that can no longer be confined to consulting rooms, doctor’s offices, or inside of people’s heads.” I believe Nature Connected Coaching to be such an approach to healing. Having spent the time connecting with nature, and one another, I felt a strong sense of one-ness. A compassion to care for the earth strengthened within me. A goal, I assume, for ecotherapy.
What a thought that “if the self is expanded to include the natural world, behavior leading to destruction of this world will be experienced as self-destruction.” – Where Psyche meets Gaia. If we can help individuals feel connected and at one with nature and one another, I don’t think the political realm would matter so much, as people would be drawn to take the right steps in caring for our earth community, no matter what the politicians believed or the rules said. Love breaks all the rules!
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After some more processing time and a good conversation with my husband, David, this morning I wanted to add more of my thoughts and in a way, come clean. I struggled with these readings. There is something about the big scientific words that shut me down. So I did lots of looking up definitions and chewing my way through some of what seemed garbled (lots of sciency words together). While I enjoyed the concepts and took away what I believe to be very supportive information for this path I am on, connecting others back to nature. I am realizing I am much simpler, it is much simpler. I think we, humans, get this idea that we need to understand, so therefore we label and organize and study and we separate to better understand and we head down these “thought trails” that lead us further away from the knowing, from the connection. I am very partial to the scripture from Proverbs, but this is my own paraphrasing… Trust in your source with all your heart; lean not on your own understanding. Seek soul-direction in all you do and your path will be made clear. I guess that is where I feel the science falls short. Trust in knowing. Faith in source. The skills needed? To be full of awe and wonder like that of a child, open and accepting of what is, as it is. To see and feel life in everything. Oneness.
Another confession…my teenage sons think I am becoming a hippie. I’m OK with that!
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Thanks all, for the love and support. It is actually a very difficult thing for me to admit to anything that shows me less than “perfect” but I am getting so much better. Admitting my imperfections, weaknesses and being in relationship to my brokenness has been a huge growth point. Nature has certainly modeled that for me. Finding the character and beauty in what would be considered flaws or imperfections. Seeing life flourish beyond obstacles to abundance, sometimes because of them! Feeling the vulnerability in being authentic. Self acceptance and letting go of people pleasing. While I still wrestle with these issues each experience of embracing my true self and learning to love me for who I am in this moment makes each next time that much easier, as does your support – so many thanks!
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Looking back over the Studnet Handbook for the Foundations 1 section I am amazed and thrilled with all that we have covered!
One sentence summary: Self awareness and personal growth!
This first foundation has helped me:
1.) get clear in my sense of vision – where my soul-direction is leading me, whether I was aware of it or opened to it
2.) be open to the growth I need for the path I am on into this vision – for me specifically this includes my learning to acknowledge, understand and read my personal emotions and those of others I am picking up on – plus how and where my personal grief walk will aid me in the grief work I feel lead to guide others through
3.) understand my need for deep connection to be in my fullest expression / truest self to best be able to guide others – to center myself into my ideal coaching presence – learning how to settle myself into that space in whatever environment I find myself
4.) start to put some shape to what this will look like down the road – built on a strong foundation!
5.) practice – practice – practice – thanks one and all for your openness and willingness to enter into this space of vulnerability to learn and grow and help me do the same -
Connection to nature brings me an awareness of my place in the one-ness of all. Being plugged in to that source provides a clarity and comfort for me. Slows me down and helps me know and see things in a non-dual state. The better connected the more clear the awareness. Maintaining and nurturing that connection is important for my sanity. As I drift away from that connection the “world” takes over. My ego takes over and I become more concerned with images and perceptions that others have of me or what I may perceive, they perceive. When connected I know that those perceptions have no basis for guiding me in the bigger picture of my purpose of life. Yet, we live in this “world.” So my challenge now is to learn to live in both, to balance my nature connectedness with my ego that is necessary to survive in the “world” as we have created it to be. My re-entry experience from the foundations intensive has taught me that I have some serious discovery to learn how to bring back the mountain top experience and incorporate it into my daily real-world life.
Having experienced first hand the ability to be so immersed in nature and open to it’s guidance for the coaching of another at the foundations intensive has fueled me to stay on top of my daily nature connection time, as well as, to continue learning more on this path of connection. The soul-direction I am able to plug in to when my connection is deep is enlightening. Again, the challenge now, I feel is to learn how to connect to that level when not immersed in a deep wilderness location. The connection to nature is key in my feeling guided by source versus my ego in coaching others on their own path. It gets me out of the way to guide them in their finding the answers for themselves.
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Trying to find it myself…using my phone to zoom in but can’t find the link, can’t seem to get to where it is via a computer.
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So much good stuff, Shari and Kim! First, Shari “…helps me to not have expectations of how a client might react or behave when moving into threshold. …their own experience in a way that best serves the client…Allowing the client to move forward in his/her own time is something I need to be sensitive to and not impose my own perspective or inclinations.” Yes, yes and yes! Such a struggle still for me to want to just fix it, to give the answers and move on but knowing they have to discover their own answers on their time and in the way that best suits them. Get out of the way and let nature take it’s course. And Kim, “…how the Threshold can truly change the thinking someone has during a coaching session(s). And the awareness that once the thinking changes, the behaviors can start to follow. Not that it is necessarily instant but there is that moment comes when the needed changes can start happening. And the commitment comes.” Almost like once you know different you can’t go back. Not that it is easy to change but the new knowing sure makes it uncomfortable to do the old way! Maya Angelo used to say, “Once you know better, you do better.”
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“For each client it will be unique but we, as coaches, should seek places that reflect and support that which will most help them through learning their stories first!” Thank you, Kim, for highlighting the importance of learning our clients stories. They are each unique and without taking the time to learn of their individual unique experiences we can’t coach them in the specific way they may need to be led. Our asking questions to dig deeper within their stories can help them notice more than they may have at the time, or give them a new perspective to look at the story through, providing them with growth in self-awareness. There also requires a good amount of trust on the clients part to begin to open to some of the difficult stories that may really get to the deeper issues that may bring greater insight.
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Mandy – I too have been thinking about our spruce tea experience and am so much more aware of the tips of those around me now when I hike and wander in nature. I can remember the “Don’t take the first don’t, take the last” but can you fill me in on the rest? I know it included giving something in return but wish I had written down the whole saying. Thanks!
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“I’m fine” – does not cut it anymore! So true. (and I hear that all the time from my teenager…errr.) Beginning this journey has certainly opened up my curiosity. I want to learn more about the gifts found in nature. I want to know more about what makes others tick. I want to hear their stories, what has shaped them to the being they are today and where are they headed?
I am so honored and excited to be on this path with all of you – to be learning and growing and getting deep into this connection – now that is FINE!
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“It’s not about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain” – Love it. I am really feeling pulled to accompany others as they move through their dark, whether walking or dancing! I think it is so important for us to share about our trials and help others through similar instances. We were created for community. We all have to go down our own path but I see points where our paths cross from time to time, let’s take advantage of those points to help carry another’s load, encourage their steps, shine a light on another’s path hoping to make the journey a bit more comfortable, especially if it is a difficult stretch.
Love the idea of putting the lyrics, or maybe an image that brings them to mind, to our vision boards.
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Amber, the sun is a key for me. Since returning from Foundations I have found that no matter how late I stay up at night I am waking as the sun is rising. The birds or even our cat seem instrumental in helping that happen, too. Many days it’s welcome pulls me out of bed to sit within its rays as they climb across my front step, other days I wander over to Lookout Park which is about 10 mins from my house and climb to the highest point around and am able to feel the sun spread its color and warmth across the sky to the mountains to my west. Music is certainly another source to set my soul back on the mountain top. Are you familiar with Birdtalker? Check them out, especially “One”. As I read your response I couldn’t help but think that your song belongs on your vision board! Sounds like it brings you into your vision. What else are you putting there?
Popping back in with an edit as I just went to the front step for some morning sun and was gifted with some metaphors I am feeling pulled to share as this was enlightening to me for my journey. The sun, particularly at sunrise, is bringing light into the darkness. I am feeling lead to grief work, specifically walking with those who find themselves in a darkness and guiding them into light, or maybe just bringing them some light to see in their dark. The sun rises each morning. It is a constant. We may not always see it through our cloudy skies but it is always there, if only on the other side. Sometimes we need someone to help us break through the clouds to see it. Our friend the wind often has some affect there. As well as, time. Often we just need to hang on a weather the storm to get to the otherside! Nature finds healing and balance through time. The east. The sun rises in the east. New beginnings, rising anew each day. No matter what happens the day before no mater the dark we go through at night, it always rises again. I am definitely in the east with the beginnings of this new PATH. Grateful today, for these insights, for friends to share them with and walk with as we are all on this journey together. HUGS!
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Kim – Thanks for sharing this quote from page 196 of the The Way of Wilderness, when Harper talks about “… the awareness of our expanded self is the experience of wholeness…the experience of wholeness, however brief, is perhaps the most healing experience available to us.” This spoke to me on many levels. The awareness of our expanded self is very much the sense I pull from my nature connection. Plus the experience of wholeness being a healing experience, I found much healing working through the ceremonies we experienced at the intensive. Thanks for shining a light on that quote!