[Lauren Lucek]

What does it mean to be connected to Nature, and how can that relationship support your coaching?

Being connected to Nature isn’t something that I put a lot of thought into for most of my life; it just was a part of me. I grew up in the woods of New Hampshire, in a town of 800 people, where the closest store was two miles away. I spent most of my childhood exploring my little town by bike and on foot. The fastest way across town was to cut through the woods, which often involved small river crossings, climbing up large hills, getting slightly lost, but always an adventure. Thinking back, my parents never worried about where I was, as long as I came home when the streetlights came on. Across the stream in my backyard is a bunch of trees with small openings of moss-covered ground. I built intricate forts there and called it my ‘house in the forest’. My parents were only allowed to visit if I invited them. I camped there often, never with a tent, just my sleeping bag on top of the moss. On occasion, I would invite my Dad to ‘come over to my house’, to build a fire with me (as that was the rule). He would bring hot chocolate and I would show him new additions to my house. This was my special spot.
All of my summers from the age of 8 to 16, for eight weeks, were spent at a camp in Maine. The camp is built on Lake Sebago, with cabins hanging over the water or nestled into the trees. There is no electricity in the cabins, so when it gets dark, you go to sleep, and as the sun rises we did, and ran down to the lake for our morning dips. This place is still the most magical important place to me. I made life-long friends, learned so many skills, was immersed in Nature, and never wanted to go home at the end of the summer.
Reflecting back on my childhood, I feel very privileged that I grew up where I did and had the opportunities to live my life so freely.
Something that really hits home with me from the Coyote’s Guide and other readings is the notion of Nature Deficit Disorder and it’s effect on children. ‘Playful, meaningful connection with the wild world outdoors needs to be a fundamental ingredient of every childhood. We cannot let it invisibly slip away. We must consciously choose if for our children, our communities and ourselves.’ ‘…our bodies and brains have millions of build in neurological connections with the environment, waiting to be activated.’ I’m not sure if my parents intentionally created these situations so that I would have these experiences, but I’m happy that we moved from San Francisco to New Hampshire when I was three. I feel that the ability to grow up as I did is so important, and as an aunt (and maybe someday as a parent), I want to give my niece opportunities to explore this wild world. I know that this world isn’t as safe as it was when I grew up, but this business of ‘screen time’ disgusts me.
As a guide and living in downtown San Diego, I have many potential clients that never really get out of the city. When in reality, even going to the beach and sitting there watching the waves, can offer a sense of solace and connection to the Earth. I like the idea of ‘Stretching Peoples’ Edges’ from the Coyote’s Guide. Jon Young says, ‘By circling around the periphery of those you mentor, you can guide them out from their indoor comfort zones, to the edge and farther edge of their experience and knowledge. Meet people where they are, and then intrigue them and entice them into ever-widening connection with the wilderness beyond the edge of town. When you find that edge, you can stretch and pull them to a new edge, and then another, deeper and deeper into a sense of comfort and kinship with the wilderness of the natural world.’ I believe this will be an important piece of my work as a coach and guide, especially as long as I live in San Diego. To show the ability to connect with something bigger than them, which is easily accessible, will be important. Explaining my own connection with Nature and the Earth, and how it grounds me and allows me to be vulnerable without judgment, is an excellent stepping stone in getting started on the work that my clients will be coming to me for.

[Lauren Lucek]

Reflection on my Wander:

The first time I went on my wander, I had put it off for several days, waiting for that perfect time. As Lyria stated, there isn’t always a perfect time, I just had to get out and do it.
I started from a suspension bridge I found a few blocks from my house, in a neighborhood that I hadn’t really explored. It stretched across a canyon filled with cactus, small palms and lots of flowers beginning to bloom. I’m actually pretty afraid of heights and the swinging motion of the bridge didn’t help. But I looked at this as a challenge; similar to how I’m feeling about my current career and where I would like to be in a year.
I’ve been frustrated at work. Lately I have felt a huge lack of passion as a bartender and am really looking forward to starting a new career as a Nature-connected life coach. It seems everything related to my bartending and management position has become a chore, and not one that I get much satisfaction doing. It’s hard for me to spend time preparing training modules, creating cocktails and visiting places for new ideas and networking. I’m looking at my current job as a way to just make money while I do other things I love. This isn’t great because I find myself complaining often and not being my authentic self at work. Ewww…I’m becoming THAT PERSON.
Anyway, as I stood in the middle of the bridge, I looked out to the canyon and decided to let nature guide me and trust it to lead me in the thought process and observations that may arise. The end of the bridge put me in a new part of town that I had never walked around. It was filled with larger homes and beautiful landscaping. The trees and flowers here in San Diego are in full bloom. As I walked along the sidewalks, I found myself drawn to new flowers and plants that I just had to take pictures of (and later identify)! It was quiet and I heard squirrels chasing each other up the palm trees. I watched hummingbirds sucking nectar out of flowers. I crossed the street into Balboa Park, which is a huge park in the city and decided to wander into a part that I hadn’t explored before. I ended up on a trail called Trees for Health. I spent almost an hour walking along this trail and it was probably a half-mile.
I’ve been reading The Nature Fix by Florence Williams, and became really interested in the concept of ‘Forest Bathing’. Then here I find myself on a trail of trees with signs telling me information about the individual trees, their health benefits and uses…..Hmmmm…a sign?! I concluded my wander in my sit spot in the park. I wrote down all the things I saw and heard and smelled on my nearly 2-½-hour walk. I thought about how I felt then vs. when I started my wander. I hadn’t thought about work at all. I was happy and serene. In this particular wander, Nature showed up for me as a way to re-set myself, to ground myself and also to notice all these new trees, plants and flowers blooming in the spring. It was reaffirming to me that I’m headed in the right direction with EBI and continuing my love for being outside and trusting nature to show me what’s important.
I continued going on wanders throughout the last few weeks. Mostly I start at my sit spot and then walk to a new area of the park. If anything, it has been very grounding for me. I find myself refreshed and happier before I go into work. I’m still working on how to address my frustrations vocally at work. This has always been a bit of a struggle for me, but at least my brain doesn’t seem so crazy and overwhelmed.

[Lauren Lucek]

Lyria: I liked your comment ‘don’t set a time (to wander). Act now! This is what happened to me too. I had the best intentions to do my wander on my day off, a few days after our class, but then the weather wasn’t great, so I put it off, and that turned into a few more days. Finally, I was sitting in my apartment with some extra time on my hands, so I slipped on my little pack and off I went! I didn’t look at the time and arrived back home 3 hours later. I guess Nature was really calling me! Since then, when I have a chunk of my day free, I just get out and start walking. No excuses!
I really enjoyed your description of your wander in your ‘corporate’ sit spot! Very detailed! I felt like I was there! And you proved that we can all wander, even if it’s behind a concrete building. You seemed to find the beauty and the sounds of the birds, in a place where many people may never notice these things!
I can definitely relate to your feelings and thoughts around your partner and relationship, and compromising your truth and values. You made a good point when you said; ‘I think sometimes we try to hard to predict adverse results as an excuse not to try.’ But in your wander you seemed to challenge that, and also focus on what is important to you. All I can say is, Trust your Gut. The rest will follow. How did the ‘lifestyle recalibration’ work out for you?

Cindy: I found your ‘pull’ to a new place to live interesting. I like how you followed your inner compass to a town nearby, yet found nothing for sale. But you also said that you had a feeling you were in the right area. Pay attention to that. Maybe next time you guys go there, you will find that your future home has suddenly come on the market!
I don’t think it’s weird that you have a fear of getting lost during your wander. Especially like you said, we are all so used to having our phone tell us which way to go! Maybe going to a park to start is a good idea. Good luck!

[Lauren Lucek]

Loved reading all of your responses!

Joshua: I love that you take your daughter on walks with you, and you observe her observing nature and all the things around her. Seems like this kid is on a great path! I look forward to taking my niece on trips to the park and eventually camping, etc., as this was defining periods of my life as a child. I resonate with that feeling of vulnerability to others’ negative emotions. As a person that is often considered very empathetic, I find myself taking on lots of emotions from others. I don’t mind it so much, as I feel that it’s one of my greatest strengths. The key is figuring out how to HEAR people out, but not PHYSICALLY or MENTALLY/EMOTIONALY take on all they lay on you. The 7 Stairs sequence has been helpful in this, as a way to re-anchor myself.

Cory: I too think it’s amazing that you followed ‘the wind’ back to Idaho! I love my family very much, but most of them live on the East Coast, and I’m on the West. I have constantly had feelings of anxiety around my family. Am I good enough? Do I have a job that would make them proud to tell others about? Does the person I’m dating ‘fit’ into my family? How do I talk to my mother about how I feel and have felt emotionally for the last 38 years without her becoming defensive? It’s really overwhelming sometimes, and my visits home have been very few. What stood out for me is when you said, ‘with this new state of awareness and objective non-attachment,’ you were able to not be affected by what they said. Wow! I need to practice that.

Thank you!!

[Lauren Lucek]

Hey Everyone!

Thanks for everyone’s responses.

Christy: It seems like you are starting to notice your feelings and definitely connecting these feelings to what you ‘may’ need to do. The follow through is hard, for everyone, but I like to take baby steps. One thing at a time, and slowly the follow through becomes easier.

Cindy: Your comments connected to the ‘how’ and ‘conversation’ pieces of the 7-Breaths, really resonated with me. I also often feel like a control-freak, and at times, it is very difficult for me to let go of the things I can’t control. I personally have been trying to figure out what I CAN control, and try to make small changes with my own reactions and behaviors, to see if that makes a difference. And slowly it does. Things that seemed like the biggest of deals become less important in the big picture.

I had some really interesting experiences this week within my sit spot, using the 7-Breaths and Sacred Questions. I first started a basic Sensory Awareness Meditation in my apartment. This was an interesting observation, as I was flooded with negative thoughts, feelings of sadness, loneliness, and frustration…that, at this current time, I don’t really feel that often. The sounds in my building and people in the alley distracted me. I thought immediately, this isn’t going to work for me. The next day I took a walk up the street to a beautiful park, where I found my sit spot. A place under two giant Sycamore trees! There were a few people around, but that didn’t bother me. I live in Southern California; everyone is a little ‘out there’! 😉 Anyway, I immediately felt more grounded. I’m also reading The Tracker by Tom Brown Jr., which is definitely helping me to be aware of all the sounds around me, especially the birds and the way the trees sound in the breeze. I was able to immediately fall in to a much calmer state of mind. I focused on my breath and with those breaths, listened to what was calling to me. I immediately recognized all the good feelings I had and one thought/feeling that wasn’t sitting well with me. I was told over a month ago that I was being considered for a promotion at my job, but my direct boss was leaving in a few days, and I still hadn’t sat down with him to continue this conversation. I was being passive, putting my needs last, and just waiting. After journaling a bit, answering some Sacred Questions and breathing more, I texted my boss and told him that I needed to sit down with him before he left. I wanted to discuss my future there and boldly stated what I wanted and what I felt I deserved. He immediately responded and asked me to come in early to work. We sat down, chatted; I was promoted, given a raise and some other bonuses! I was slightly dumbfounded at what was going on, but smiled to myself a bit. Was this all happening because I finally took the time to take the time to explore what was making me feel a bit off/frustrated, and then actually DEALING with it instead of pushing it to the back of my mind??? I don’t exactly know. Things won’t be handed to me on a silver platter. I need to go after what I want and deserve. My sister always says, ‘Without Challenge, there is no change.” My challenge is expressing myself and feeling like I’m worthy for all the good things in this life. Baby steps, one thing at a time, more breathing, more observing. See you all on Thursday finally! Take care!
-Lauren

[Lauren Lucek]

Hey everyone! My name is Lauren and I currently live in San Diego. I grew up in New England and always had the mountains, lakes and rivers surrounding me. I have a degree in Outdoor Leadership and Education, and worked for Outward Bound and some small non-profit wilderness therapy schools. Over the years, my life changed and I slowly started finding jobs in the restaurant industry in order to have a flexible schedule and make quick money. I’m currently a bar manager, and have been struggling with feeling like I’m not doing much for people in a ‘positive’ way, (nor myself). Finding EBI online was incredibly exciting! I couldn’t believe that this program existed because Nature Connected Life Coaching is exactly what I feel I was meant to do.
Nature Connection to me, is that feeling I get, when I take some time out of my hectic schedule and busy city life, to slow down, breathe, reflect on my life, and calm my mind. There is this intense energy I feel when I get out to go for a hike or go for an early morning surf session (where I mostly sit on my board and feel the waves roll in and watch the dolphins swim by). This past October I took a solo trip to Oregon, where I hiked and camped all over the state. It was something I had wanted to do for years, and it was the best thing I have done for myself in a long time. Not only did I see beautiful scenery the entire time, but I felt like I was able to reset my whole life. I knew that I had to make some changes and get myself out of this monotonous rut that I have found myself in. The healing for myself that I took away from that trip was much needed. I really want to guide people to see and feel what I did, while immersed in nature, even if it’s for a short time.
Something that I struggle with in maintaining this nature connection, is allotting time for myself. It’s very easy for me to get wrapped up in the craziness of daily life and commitments to others, when really I need and can, make time for myself.
I am incredibly excited to meet all of you and share our knowledge and experiences! I think it’s very interesting to hear about your backgrounds and ways you plan to use this training/certification in the future. I can’t make the class tonight, but look forward to the next one.

[Lauren Lucek]

Hi Wendy and Everyone!
Looking forward to meeting you all on Friday!!
I’m Lauren and I’m from San Diego. I will be staying with some friends in Boulder and renting a car for the duration. If anyone is staying in Boulder and needs a ride to the Star House daily, let me know.
I’m super excited to start the program and be in Colorado for the next week.

Ryan, do we need to bring any of the textbooks for this intensive?

See you all soon.
-Lauren