[Cory Steele]

I had a friend from San Francisco stop by on there way back home, and we went through a guiding session together.
She was unsure of whether or not she should be staying in her current career path because she really enjoys the travel and adventure that comes from being a flight attendant. However, she also likes the idea of having something more stable and would like to settle in one place and really just have a family to go home to.
She told me an in-depth explanation of pros and cons for either side. We then sat in silence taking in many deep breaths. I asked her without feeling where do you feel drawn too. What brings you to the calmest state of being and presence. She told me that she felt called to the mountains here in Colorado. Not knowing why, but something felt like a strong pull to the mountains.
After some more silence and her own meditation on the matter she looked at me and said, “ I want to continue with this job while I still have my time to myself to be adventurous and explore, but I know one day after that I will be back here to have family.”
The whole experience showed me how powerful being present and letting go of the idea that we need to have constant control. It is possible to get caught in a vicious cycle of thinking what has to be planned out to an extend you miss everything that is happening right in front of us. Take the time to enjoy each day and allow things to flow and everything will happen just fine. If we try to control how things should be to such a high degree then we might miss out on everything else that is happening, or better opportunities for us.
It really showed me the power of just allowing and trusting things to happen. When we try and control nature then we stop it from happening, but when we allow life and nature to just be beautiful things happen.

[Cory Steele]

I had a deep listening moment with a friend from California. She was talking to me about a guy she had been seeing and was asking me for a different point of view on some things. She was confused on how he was acting towards her because a couple months back she told him how she had felt and he ended up leaving to Africa for a couple months. Then his demeanor changed completely when he got back. He asked her to take a trip with her back to Africa, and she asked me what I think she should do because she didn’t know if she had feelings for him or just this idea of him. I noticed that she had been focusing a lot on who he was based on external things that had stood out such as he had money and the fact that he traveled a lot as a kid growing up. I noticed that she is also the person who is up for an adventure and spontaneous things, and she also loved to travel. I asked her to really go internally and see if she has feelings for him, or if he is someone in her life that is mirroring the qualities in herself that she really enjoyed. We sat for a couple moments in silence and she said, “you know I really don’t know if it’s feelings towards him that I like.”
It really made me start to have this inner knowing and feeling that we also do this in our every day lives. We stay in situations that provide us comfort with things and never really venture out of that comfort zone. I could definitely see it in her, but also in myself. We like things that are how we define ourselves. I started to see that most of the things in my life were mirroring certain things within myself. I noticed several synchronistic things happening the next couple of days. I had a certain mindset that I had about myself regarding specific relationships with people. How I thought about myself was completely mirrored in my external environment with certain people. I noticed that once I took myself out of the comfortable belief system I had before my relationships changed. They had more depth and meaning behind them and were not bogged down by negative patterns of thinking that I had before.
One specific example was my relationship with my brother. I used to have a very toxic belief that I was only now starting to address with him. I thought I was superior to him because I had a college degree and a big checklist of how society deems one “successful” in our modern world. After the conversation with my friend I started to really internalize and feel that I was no better than any other person in this world. Then something profound happened and my brother called as I was going through this realization. It was very synchronistic, and we had a discussion for a couple hours. It was a very genuine conversation and it was something I had not felt whenever we had talked before. It was not a superior mindset, or even a brother to brother conversation. It was this authentic human to human meaningful talk about life.

[Cory Steele]

This past week I sat and mediated for a lot longer than I normally do. I became very still and present and was able to completely observe my thoughts from a very objective place with no attachment whatsoever. I then started to pick up on the wind here in Denver (it has been extremely windy several days the past couple of weeks), and that led me to another place where I was able to observe some things deep within my subconscious mind that had to do with my family.

The wind reminded me of my hometown in Idaho and I felt as though nature was communicating with me in that moment. So, I decided to hop on a plane and go back to see some family. Once I got there I saw some family I had not seen in a while; my uncle and my grandfather. I had not talked to them in a long time. They are both very loving people but would constantly find ways to pick at me. What seemed like endless harmless fun to them actually end up really hurting me. However, with this new state of awareness and objective non-attachment I was able to just not be affected by what they were saying to me.

I had another moment like this while back in Idaho. My brother came over to my mom’s house where I was staying and we had the most honest and deep conversation we have ever had. We grew up with a single teenage mom, and my brother held a deep grudge towards my dad. This can still be seen in his life today. As a little kid I would always be able to since whenever my mom or brother was feeling something. I felt it as if it was my own but from that same place of objective awareness I just observed both of them. Instead of picking up on things that were not my own and feeling negativity from them I was able to give my advice from the outside.

This trip back really helped me increase my awareness, and it was very profound how the mediation mixed with the wind pulled me towards Idaho and some things I still had not dealt with there. It has already helped me back here in Denver by continuing that same feeling in my work life as well as my personal life. It truly is remarkable the role that nature plays in our lives if we just listen to what is being said.

[Cory Steele]

I found myself using objective awareness in three very different places the last two weeks.
Meditation in solitude: I put on some noise canceling headphones and turn the lights in my room to a very dim setting, and I noticed a very deep connection of love. It wasn’t the regular conditional love that we have for loved ones or things we enjoy. This was a deep presence and understanding who I am in this grand cosmos of limitless “space/time.” It was a feeling of unconditional love for every one and everything. It showed me that when I start to feel or experience problems in my life all I have to do is go to that deep awareness and realization that everything will be alright. That regardless of what happens in life things are never as bad as we might make them out to be in our heads. The presence taught me that we can ONLY ever do what is in the present moment. We are often a victim of our thought patterns constantly worrying about the future or dwelling on the past.
Crowded restaurant: I was sitting at a local dinner with my girlfriend and took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and then became very aware of the present moment. I noticed the loud sounds of fryers, people talking, and the music that was playing in the background. Before I was completely fixed in the present moment I was feeling very irritated and had been arguing with my girlfriend. However, once I did step out of the thinking state I started to sense everything that was actually happening. It helped me stop the bickering because I just had this innate knowing that the reason I was irritated had nothing to do with her. It was because I was hot in this crowded and noisy room. I was picking up on conversations of gossip that didn’t matter to me, yet somehow subconsciously letting it control me. Almost like a tv advertisement that has the infinitesimal number of subliminal messages in them. It taught me that I have to be very careful with how I may let in certain things into my environment and to focus on my presence more often.
On a flight for work: I was on a flight from Chicago to Baltimore and there was a passenger in first class that was not happy about the WIFI going out. After going back and forth about it I went to the galley and took a deep breath and focused on the presence moment. I started to notice that I felt anxious. Why? I did not do anything on purpose to displease this person. I can not control if something works or if it is broken. Then I started to understand that I shouldn’t take it personally. He had something to get done for work, and that in turn stressed him out and caused him to act that way. This did not mean he is an evil person, or that I am at fault. It taught me to be neutral in the present moment and to see how someone feels about a situation and compare that with how they might be displacing that emotion/feeling onto something else.

Overall practicing objective awareness taught me to remain in the present moment, and to not take things to personal and focus on a more loving and understanding point of view.

[Cory Steele]

I grew up in a small town in Idaho, and always thought about moving out and going to see bigger and better things. After I obtained a Bachelor of Science in Psychology I packed up and moved to New York City two days after graduation. Once there I realized how disconnected I felt from everything in my life. I became a flight attendant and continued my journey looking for connection traveling from city to city; country to country. It wasn’t until I picked up yoga, meditation, and a rekindled love for nature that I started to feel the lost connection. I would just go sit somewhere in the woods, or at a beach and forget about my problems. I felt the wholeness of being present and the wisdom of what each moment presented to me.
Nature-Connection since then has been about connecting to everything in the moment I am in. The presence of being in nature, and having it provide you with a feeling of connection. The connection to your deeper self, to the community as well other living things, and to nature itself. It was the connection to everyone, and everything. It is also having the gratitude of being in the beauty that you are in. I also have started to realize that without nature, there is no me. It provides the food we eat, the air we breath, and the water we drink. Nature gives life to all living things. We are apart of nature, and by taking care of it we are taking care of our self.
The hardest part about keeping that connection comes from being around things that cause us to forget the connection, and instead focus on the separation. We have destroyed so much of nature for things; from resources to land to the oceans. We push the narrative of stripping down the planet for all the resources on it, and don’t think about how this might affect us. We are constantly caught in a narrative of an us vs them mentality. Whether it is political affiliation, financial inequality, or any number of other separation ideals. Nature helps me realize that everything is connected to everything else, and that means I am always trying to be aware of how I am affecting the world that I am in.

[Cory Steele]

This experience you had made me think so much of how we can become so disconnected in our world. I can recall so many experiences where I was having a conversation with someone, and I felt like we were in two different worlds. At the dentist when I am sitting getting my teeth cleaned and everyone around is talking about me as if I am an object. The same goes for at the doctor’s office. I have become an object that is being worked on.
I loved reading about your experience working as a hospice nurse and you connected with another individual on a deeper level. You were able to transcend all held belief patterns such as gender, race, and all other things we use to define people in our world. It is so beautiful and rewarding when we are able to connect on that deeper soul level where we see that we have so much more to connect with of things that bring us together.

[Cory Steele]

That sounds very enlightening! I imagine that it was not easy to see someone you love struggle like that. Especially when you could sense the anxiety within him. However, for you to see that it was something that he had to experience and learn shows a lot. Some people would not have been so patient to allow others to learn their own lessons in life. We often think our point of view is going to be the best, but when we allow others to take their own path then we see how much more there is to learn from other people’s paths. Sounds like you too both benefited greatly from the trip!

[Cory Steele]

It is very interesting that you point out the stress of working in the city. I believe this is something that a lot of the westernized world experiences. We have so much going on in our lives that we take on and it can become overwhelming. I think the fact you incorporate physical exercise in to bring the awareness back to self is a very helpful way to cope. In today’s world we can take on a lot of things from the external environment, and completely neglect to take care of our individual needs. Exercise is a great way to do that. It causes us to focus on what we are doing in the present moment. Each breath and every step becomes something that we are completely in tuned to and the rest of the distractions and external things seem to dissipate.

[Cory Steele]

Hello Joshua! That is very cool that your daughter shares the love for nature! I think that is very interesting that you pointed out that practicing these things may open one up to negative emotions. I do think that it can have the potential to, if you let it. I have always thought that the more empathetic and aware one is can be hard to handle. My thinking behind this is that if you are able to not only sympathize with someone in a situation, but empathize; really FEEL what the other person is feeling, then it can be overwhelming. At work you were only trying to be aware of what the other person is feeling, and they took it the wrong way. A lot of times it seems that we are only trying to help and only have good intentions. I will say that from personal experience you can only control your level of awareness, and that sometimes leads to others taking things the wrong way. Never get discouraged though because the positivity you bring to situations will continued to make you a “better person” and by being a better person you are making the world a better place in return!

[Cory Steele]

That is so interesting about your recent change in work. I think that what you experienced is what so many other people often experience as well. I can at least speak for myself in the case of not getting things done. Constantly trapped in a state of emotion of maybe not deserving it and this can also lead to overthinking things. I found it fascinating that Lyria used the word awakening. It is almost like waking up and realizing how much power is within to obtain something that you want. I know that before I would be in a state of overthinking and not be able to actually focus on what it is I want. Your story was very moving and I like seeing that people are able to change things around for themselves by realizing the power within them!

[Cory Steele]

I agree with your city anecdote. We forget about the connection that we have with all living things when we are in a city. At least for the most part. It is always so interesting when you are out on a trail and you can strike up a conversation with someone very easily. However, you try to do that with someone in the city and they might ignore you and keep walking. We have become so disconnected that sometimes we do not see another person in front of us. We pull out our phones to not have to interact with anyone else. I too like nature because of its calming effects and ability to see the connections more clearly than the fast-paced settings of a non-stop city.