Cory Steele
Forum Replies Created
-
Initial Post
I have a client I have worked with several times. She battles a lot with uncertainty and change. She is constantly thinking about the next thing, and what she should do, or should have done. Never really allowing herself to connect with the present moment and be with it.
To establish the coaching agreement I always ask for permission to hold a sacred space of non-judgement for her to be her authentic self, and that anything we talk about will not be shared in a very public manner as to expose more than she would like. The next question after establishing this has always been what is coming up/ what do you want to focus on right NOW (emphasis on the now).
When we start talking I notice that there is still an underlying focus on something that happened or might happen in the future. So, I always try to bring her back to the present moment. I do this by incorporating some things from this module, as well as some other studies in neuroscience. I spend a lot of time in the metaphysical world of thoughts, beliefs, and perceptions. I help her notice more about how her thoughts about the event that is causing worry is something that the neurons have just been trained to do, and that you can untrain them to do that as well. Using the analogy of the Grand Canyon, we went through some breathing exercises to bring her centered more into her body and the moment in the here and now. We started to work more from the feeling of presence, and creating from here, vs creating from a cognitive thought-based place.
This seemed to help in the moment. However, I noticed that working with her over time it was always the old patterns that came back up. She didn’t want to do much of the work involved with change, only wanting the results.
I learned that as much as I want other people to thrive and succeed at what they want, I can’t want it more than them. When that happened, I would become drained because I was putting more into it than they were. I learned a lot about myself and just trusting that the client will work through things in their own way, and in their own time. It does no good to lose myself, and not be able to help anyone out. -
Summary Post
I found this entire module, both in person and in this online discussion very beneficial and eye opening. I have had this vision, but the ego in me has been trying to put what it wants into reality vs something more from the soul. I had been struggling thinking of who I want to work with, but after a lot of surrender and listening to the flow of nature I found who it is I want to work with, and even started to see how that could happen. Reading through everyone else’s experience was a great experience to witness as well. Seeing how everyone else went through/is going through to get to the core of bringing that vision out for the world. I look forward to seeing all of you tomorrow, and continue down this path together!
-
Initial Post
This question required a lot of introspection, and it wasn’t until watching the video and listening to each of what you all said that it really hit home. My work/passion/ what I excel at is seeing the deeper abstract picture of things. It is a very spiritual and some would say “woo woo” way of seeing things. This has been the biggest road block for the last couple of years. Caring what it looks like to others. Being afraid of the judgment and ridicule of how my family, friends, coworkers would see me. Unable to live how I want to live, and living how it is expected of me. However, being a part of this intensive as well as just learning every day, I am able to live more authentically.
This means working with people who are also as Sandy stated in the call in “tired of the status quo.” There are other ways of seeing this world; deeper, esoteric, and spiritual ways of seeing it. I want to work with people in this demographic where the “normal” way of being can be challenged and alternative perspectives can thrive for people to build a more harmonious and beautiful way of life. The ideal group would understand that we are all connected. There is no separation, and that has been physically proven by science. It is moving beyond the identity of self to heal, but remain aware that we all live our own individual lives that is so complex and created by countless present moments. In each moment our thoughts, beliefs, and perceptions are being formed or playing out the story for us. I want to help people work in that deep area of changing limiting beliefs and seeing beyond the veil. Helping people increase a deeper awareness of self beyond the ego.
I imagine working with them by building a rapport with them where they are comfortable enough and vulnerable enough to communicate with me, and trust me to hold that space. It would be a connection based more in soul than the mind and ego. Being completely engaged in the present moment. The other person understands that there will be absolutely no judgment from me, regardless of what they have to say. Having people sit in that authenticity and allow them to work from there and build a life that is more aligned with their soul and not their ego. Where they are more connected to spirit/ the universe and living a life that is not just for the self, but for the soul and the collective as well.
Nature would come into play because the ideal client would understand that we are nature. What we do to others we do to ourselves. What we do to our environment we do to ourselves. There would be an understanding that nature is every where and can help all of us learn, grow, and heal. -
Summary Post
Working in the threshold experience with several practice clients has really opened my eyes to the immensity that is involved with each individual. I remember sitting in the lodge and thinking of what to look for, and now I realize it is so unique (yet still recognizable) in different people. Taylor had pointed out that there is no one right way. I found that so true! Everyone is on their own path, and I found I walk with others during those moments of transformation. However, really seeing how each person gets there is really a thing of beauty. I noticed what works for someone might not work for another. We all have these experiences of working in the threshold, but it is never going to be the same. The energy there feels similar, but the specifics of how it looks in every one of the clients’ lives is as unique as they are. -
Initial Post
As a client In the Threshold I gained a profound appreciation for the 50/50 relationship with nature. When I was the client, I was able to really shift my perception with regards to my deeper need. While at the same time allowing Nature to help facilitate that perceptual change in the process. As a coach I am able to take that experience and have a better understanding when I work with others. The understanding that as a client I was trusting in the process, and as a coach I hope to provide the necessary space to allow for the client to also feel that safe space to allow Nature to really work with all of us. Another aspect of importance I found is the comfort level. I am usually very open to talking about a plethora of topics, and have no problem being vulnerable. When I was in the setting as a client and really sharing, I noticed that safe space held by everyone, which could also be why it was so easy for me to open up and be vulnerable during the intensive. That example of all of you holding that space showed me how important it was for myself to really dedicate the awareness and trust to set up that space as well.
As a coach I feel I am really utilizing the coaching presence competency, as well as establishing trust and intimacy with the client. When I am able to really hold that container and presence to be fully present and adaptable with the client then I feel I will be in a more advantageous space to allow for that transformational peak in baseline. The trust must be there in order for the client to have that experience as well. No matter how present I am, if the client is not in a position where they are comfortable, how can I expect them to be fully engaged in a supportive environment. -
Summary Post
I am always amazed of how much thought and insight each and every person brings to the discussion. Reading through all the posts has once again opened my mind to all the different perspectives and how the vision each one brings plays a role in the overall vision that is there in the collective. I feel very strongly about what MJ has shared. I see a lot of the time that I am also in a place of wanting to live my passion, but my current state isn’t allowing me to do so. Back at the intensive I remember having conversations where people had mentioned wanting to live an authentic life true to themselves. We are all constantly working on ourselves and our vision that is coming from a deeper place inside of us. Working with nature and working with people has such a symbiotic relationship. Reading Daniels response to MJ about how the collective can feel things happening in the deeper sub/conscious and might not be aware of exactly the cause of it really hit that point right on the head. When we cause harm to the planet of which we are apart of we end up harming ourselves. Maybe not the individual self that sees something happening right away, but the part of ourselves that is eternal and part of the spirit of this planet and everything within it.
-
Initial Post Foundation two
Sorry it’s a little late everyone!
Where do Ecopsychology and coaching come together? The fact that we are in a nature connected coaching course really helps me see how those two are intertwined. We are nature, every atom, every substance of energy that makes us up also creates nature. We are one in the same. From my own personal journey through life I can never take myself out of nature. When I come under the illusion that I am separate that is when suffering occurs. However, When I am fully present and my essence is of nature that is when life becomes this beautiful canvas to have fun with. I try to take this concept into every aspect of my life, coaching and beyond. It is then that I am able to hold space for being and total awareness.
This blend creates a wonderful harmony for me to really work with people everywhere that we go. With this premise I hold the understanding that this applies to more than just the woods I set foot in, or the mountains I go and climb. It is on a plane, it is in my bed, it is EVERYWHERE.
The skills I have found that require me to do so come from my understanding about this reality, as well as some helpful guide stones like the indicators of awareness. I have found quiet mind to be a huge factor for me in this work. The others are all just as important, but I have found this has been massive for me throughout my journey. -
Taylor,
I love your experience around creating the coaching agreement. Clearly stating your own personal and professional beliefs as separate things really seems like it gives a lot more to the client. They get to also be with the different parts of you, and to me it creates a more intimate setting with working with People. That is really important that you establish the intention of coaching confidentiality and sacred space even when working with people that you know. That is something I lack sometimes, but I feel it is important to do. That way both parties are in the right state. Thank you for sharing! -
Sandy,
I’m very interested in this situation. It sounds like you were really able to hold that sacred space. I know it seems tricky sometimes, wondering if anything is actually happening when she appears to be just talking a lot. On the surface it looks like she could have gone through her on stages of the cycles of change, but there might always be more underneath. Maybe she didn’t do the maintenance, or maybe she had a different way of going through it. Either way it is amazing to hear how your experience unfolded. -
Ben,
It really sounds like you hit the nail on the head with utilizing the resourcing with the pendulation!You really allowed her to increase her awareness around what it was she was thinking, and not get stuck in that loop. I also like that you brought in the 7 breaths because she was already somewhat comfortable with meditation and focusing on the breath. -
Brooke, I look forward to hearing how your work with veterans goes. I think that is so beautiful how you want to incorporate nature as a way of helping them in the development of their whole life, and not just as you said in one specific aspect. Reading your post I could really tell that this is something that you are driven about. The other demographic of young adults is so important. In our society we have lost the way of how to really guide people into that next step. It is about here is what you are going to do because it is expected of you, instead of what do you want to do. Work with that and help cultivate that, I might have to work with you to gain some insight from you.
-
Sandy, you are going to do so well with your coaching. Your post really resonated with me and a very deep level. I am in the middle of my own hero’s journey at the moment (even reading Joseph Campells book right now). As someone who has been caught up with the norm of what society has me doing, instead of doing what I want to do; I can tell you have a very passionate message behind you. Maybe we will have to work together. I enjoyed the book you lent me by good ol’ Alan Watts. I look forward to seeing you and everyone else on Monday.
-
MJ, thank you so much for sharing this. I find it inspirational how you talk about facing that fear and being vulnerable with all of us. What you describe really hits home for me. Allowing Nature to really work with us in that 50/50 place of connection. It sounds like the presence of the coach is very important for you to be able to open up and allow you to really BE with yourself/nature. I love how aware you are about yourself, and found that what you said here really resonated with me! Can’t wait to see you and everyone else in a couple weeks!
-
Ben, I had a similar experience where I felt awkward during the sessions because I am thinking, “Is this authentic right now since we are both practicing the same thing?” I found though, like you, that once I really sat with the ICF competencies I was able to gain a better understanding. Not to mention really hone the skills that are useful for all coaches. I appreciate the fact you really talk about setting the intention and confidentiality. That is so important for establishing the trust that is necessary for a safe space. If we aren’t able to establish any trust people will not want to open up with us. Just like you said, We are there to be a co-guide with them and I have definitely noticed that cannot be done if there is not ground work set in the beginning.
-
Ben, I love your post! Talking about “vast” and “minute” on different scales from the macro universe to the micro individual. It reminds me of fractals and how its this infinite pattern continuing on towards infinity. The part about us taking on small feats, but it is the small feats that add up to really make the world what it is. Really reminds me of the butterfly affect. Einstein and said once “what you do now will echo on through eternity.” I feel like you addressing that we are in control of our own lives really encapsulates that idea!