Carrie Calkins
Forum Replies Created
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Summary post:
So, to follow up, additional thoughts…
This summer, I volunteers at the Farm Sanctuary summer camp for kids. I was a guest speaker to take the kiddos on a shamanic journey to find an animal. I use to do this regularly for a number of years, but hadn’t done so last summer or the most of this summer.
I did go and journey with the kids 2 times this summer.I always leave these sessions over joyed and energized. I love to see the little ones close their eyes and let their minds flow. To see their minds expand beyond their physical beings. When they share their experiences, it is so very cool… not to mention, hearing the experiences from the other camp counselors.
The best is receiving the thank you cards from the kids. Noting, how much they enjoyed the experience and how they didn’t realized they could have such an experience.
I may have just planted a seed for many of the kids, but that seed may continue to grow. May this be a new path they create for a greater mind expansion.
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Initial Post:
The brain… what an amazing structure, it goes well beyond the physical matter. I am literally in awe of all it does. And to think, we only know just a little bit about it.As Megan noted, the experience of connecting the animal and finding the tracks was beyond cool. I have had such experiences in the past… but each and every time, I am overwhelmed with amazement! I was literally speaking to myself saying “holy shit, holy shit, this is amazing” when I found the tracks rather quickly.
It proves focus and intention can bring “things” into our “fields” – “energy follows intention”.The other great thought that keeps coming back to me is the imagery of the Grand Canyon and our brain/ behaviors/ thoughts/ etc. That a thought or a pattern over time becomes the path of least resistance. It can create deep patterns, which make it difficult to change. However, with great intention and alot of work, we can change that Grand Canyon pathway and create a new pathway. However, “snapping back” to our previous behaviors is not uncommon. I have experienced this, myself, so many times. With this awareness of how the brain works and this imagery, I can now acknowledge what is happening and find myself working on creating that new path.
I have a client that I shared this analogy with a while back. At a recent session, she stated that she reflects back at the analogy and it helps her bring focus back to what she wants to change and not falling back into old habits.
Whew… it is hard to change long lived behaviors/ thought processes, etc… but it is possible. Mindfulness and awareness is key. Snap backs can work in both directions. Snapping back to old behaviors, but, you can also snap back to the new behaviors/ patterns.
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Trauma:
I found this face to face greatly beneficial. I like the thought of trauma being on a wide spectrum. Everyone has trauma and expresses it, or lacks in expression in many ways– physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. This session has encouraged me to go deep within myself and reflect upon my life and personal traumas.
I am currently co-facilitating a group of children at the barn at which I volunteer. It is a children’s PTSD group. They come with a variety of “issues” and I am in awe of each and everyone of them. It is interesting observing them. Are they expressing themselves as such due to normal development/ adolesence or is their behavior a result of the trauma they have experienced.
This particular group (of 18 children) get to experience the benefits and healing from animals (animals who have experienced their own trauma), nature (they get to run around in the pasture, get dirty, gather meaningful/ special findings, get fresh air, etc), support from eachother and they are given tools to help ground themself/ relax/ and nurture themselves.
My particular role thus far (this is an 8 week session, 1.5 hours a week) has been 1. supportive role, 2. giving them tools to self nurture. Last week, we practiced breathing exercises and grounding, Yesterday, we practiced mindfulness and awareness. Last night, I we practiced engaging the senses.
Engaging the senses was one of the tools that was shared during the face to face. I have used this tool multiple times since then. I find it to be very beneficial in helping a client/ patient/ child get grounded, calm themselves and self nurture. I love it because it can be practiced anywhere. -
I apologize for the late entry. I want to share a few experiences I have had since the December Face to Face.
A few weeks ago, my step daughter had a few friends over, 4 girls and 4 boys. It was FREEZING cold outside. Although I told the kids it was too cold to walk to the park, they collective grabbed their coats and headed for the park. Of course, they were not dressed appropriately for the weather.
20 minutes later, they returned, complaining about how cold it was outside, I shook my head and thought, “I told you so”. Anyway, a few minutes later, I heard my step-daughter calling for me, noting her friend was acting really weird and could not breathe. I rushed down the hallway, to find one of her girl friends having a full panic/ anxiety attack. She was gasping for air and trembling. I grabbed her hands and made eye contact with her (instructed others to leave). We sat on the floor and worked on her breathing, slowing her breaths, taking deep breaths. I then had her look at something in the room and describe it to me. She did this while we continued to work on grounding and breathing. We repeated the “describe something” a few times. Within a short period of time, she was back to a fairly normal state of mind. She stated she felt better. I got her bundled up, had a friend come sit with her while I went to make a fire and some hot cocoa.
While I was in the sunroom, getting the fire started, I noticed another one of the girls laying on the daybed under a bunch of blankets. I asked her what was going on. She said she didn’t feel inside her body, and that she felt very strange. I started to apply the techniques learned again. We worked on breathing, grounding and having her focus on an object in the room and describe what she was seeing. She was very scared and concerned. After a short while, she was feeling a little bit better, enough to get up and walk into another room. In the room, I had her practice the “this is my___________, this is my ___________” tapping and rubbing that area of the body. She eventually started to reconnect with her body and felt much better.
It was a very scary situation and I am very appreciative of the skills and knowledge I had to address what was going on. I think I prevented a few trips to the emergency room. A few of the kids said their parents would have called the ambulance.
Of note, all of the kids got the parent lecture form me about dressing appropriately and eating / drinking appropriately. The girls are pencil thin and didn’t eat, have a history of anxiety and on top of going outside without hats, mittens, etc.Another situation I applied the skills to was when I was at work. I was working in urgent care on a weekend, and a patient called in having high anxiety/ panic attacks. He wanted to speak with the Mental Health provider on call. The patient was connected with the provider. The doctor called me back and wanted the patient to be seen in the clinic for physical signs of distress due to his anxiety… shortness of breath, sweating, chest discomfort, etc. I called the patient back, who said, the doctor didn’t really help him. He didn’t give him any exercises to do to help calm him down, only told him to take his “pill”. The patient was clearly in high anxiety and was struggling. I took some time with the patient, had him get settled in the sofa, in a comfortable position and take a few deep breathes. I had him take the breaths all they way down past his feet into the floor. I was trying to help ground him. Once he was a more grounded, I had him focus on items in the room and describe them to me, which he did. We repeated the process a few times. The patient was very appreciative and was feeling much better. Hi s mother was with him, who was going to sit with him and they would both continue to look at things in the room and describe them to one another. The patient actually enjoyed the process. Not only was he feeling better, but he was seeing things in the room in a whole new way.
After all the episodes I dealt with, I kept hearing Michael say “This shit really works!”. I think those were the words from a friend of his.
I think these are very valuable tools!!! Anxiety in society is increasing at very fast rates, we need to be able to jump in when we can and help when we can and ultimately, get medical attention if and when needed. -
Post discussion-
I have thoroughly enjoyed reading these posts! Thank you all for sharing. All the posts have creating a swirling thought process in my head right now. I have greater clarity of parts work, yet greater confusion. Apparently, parts of me have been stimulated and agitated— which is all in the process. I sit here and scratch my head… I need to digest, process, incorporate and… start all over again. -
Megan, that is so awesome!!! I think we can all relate to your experience. Getting out of our own way and allowing the client to discover. I think, keeping it real and pausing to review is great. That pause allows for processing for both the coach and client.
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Initial Post:
Client issue: Anxiety.
When the coaching session started, I informed the client of confidentiality of the session. I made sure the client was kept comfortable and had the ability to speak freely, and if anything became uncomfortable or was incorrect, she was invited to notify my.
The session was initiated inside. We discussed and acknowledged the want and need. We established a plan for the experience/ threshold. We went outside, walked around the yard. We stopped occasionally, and when we did, we talked a little bit about what she was experiencing at the time (here and now), and how that may be an educational opportunity or message. We ended the session with establishing a goal and a plan to put in motion.During the session, I did not incorporate the Partswork. As I think back, I had opportunities to address ‘parts’ of her. I think, by discussing or bringing attention to her parts, more clarity could have been obtained from the session.
As I reflect back to the session, and how Partswork could have been incorporated, I realize, I am a little bit uncomfortable with the Partswork. I feel, I will need to observe others working with Partswork, in order to get a good grasp on the concept or how to use in a session.
I find the concept of Partswork fascinating tho. I feel whether I use the actual Partswork as a coaching tool or not, understanding that we all have “parts”. I have been thinking about Parts since the face to face, and have noticed my parts and parts within others. Working on my own parts, it has brought introspective thought and understanding of myself.The session went well. I and my client were happy with the outcome. I am becoming more comfortable with the NCC and the Gestalt, however, incorporating the partswork is definitely a work in progress. I do feel it will be a good tool to use with clients, even if just bringing awareness to the parts. I, could see how mirroring the clients parts with a ‘something’ in nature could be beneficial, for example, looking at the parts of a tree, flower, or garden.
There is definitely more to learn and much more practice to be had
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Post note:
I enjoyed reading the posts from others. I find it interesting our individual learning processes. They are different, yet the same. I feel we are all finding our way, finding our short comings and our gifts, reflecting upon them and then applying them to the next session.
As I continue to learn and grow and practice, I am finding that I am scared, shy, confident, excited, motivated and also realize I have so much yet to learn. I love NCC and the other components. I feel in my core this is what I am to be doing and grateful for it.
Thank you! -
Right on Brad. That is awesome! I appreciate you noting the stages of self understanding, acknowledging the brain pathways/ areas of the brain. It sounds like it was a successful session. How did you feel as a coach? Have you followed up with your client?
You should be very proud of yourself. -
Great job Brad! I loved the deer analogy that was shared. It sound exactly like what you and your client were experiencing. How did you feel during the process? I find it amazing how focus/ distraction and breathing can be so helpful.
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Megan, thank you for sharing, I am so proud of you. You were open and willing to address the issue. It has been a process and the process most likely will continue. I agree, going down the rabbit hole with clients who do not have the resources can be problematic. It is important to know what our limitations are and that the clients are supported appropriately.
Reflecting back on our progress is beneficial, I believe. It is like when in a coaching session, repeating back to the client what they are saying/ reflection.
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Yay! So cool you were able to see the stage he was in. I need to be more aware of this as well. I is helpful to see what stage they are in, the the coach and the client. Helps reduce frustration and the spinning on the hamster wheel.
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Kairon,
Thank you for sharing! You spoke beautifully. I really appreciate the discussion about the Mandala. This is a wonderful image and metaphor. I will need to sit with this for a bit, but will never look at a mandala the same again. This will be a wonderful teaching / resource for clients and myself.
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Megan… I cannot wait to try the mirror- 3rd eye meditation. This sounds awesome! Many times we do get in our own way, this sounds like it is us getting out of our way and learning / seeing more of who we are, outside of our present physical self.
Thank you so much for sharing…. I cannot wait to share my experiences.Self work on our parts can be so educational. I have not had an opportunity to work with others much on their parts, just a little bit. It is good to know and comforting that we can use these skills and knowledge on ourselves and in our own relationships. It helps us, but also helps us understand the process as we work with others.
Great job!
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Hi Anna,
Thank you for sharing. I am struggling to get practice clients myself. I applaud you on applying the parts work to your own life and situation. It is amazing to discover ourselves and figure out how and why we work the way we do. Even better, understanding how our partners work.
The more we practice with this stuff, on clients or ourselves, it gets easier and clearer.
That is awesome stuff! Great job!