Ben Florsheim
Forum Replies Created
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The client I had that I was able to practice some of the Gestalt practice was interesting to me because the session made me look introspectively, assess where I am in the session and what I am bringing in with me. This specific client is an old friend and colleague from my time selling real estate. Having this relationship made things a little more difficult especially because of the issue that was brought to the table. The issue was kind of a two partner, he was unsure that he was pursing his passion and dream in what he wanted to do and was also struggling to find balance in his life because his career was dominating his life in many ways.
In the beginning of our session I started to see the friend part of me coming out and trying to relate to him and bring my experience into the session. I immediately felt this was taking him our of the moment and not helping the session to progress. Then I felt the session becoming somewhat stagnant because I was asking questions and getting the repeated response “I don’t know”. This made me feel like I was lacking as a coach and caused me to get into my head a little bit. At this point to bring the session back to him I decided to try an experiment and see where it went. I made an eight-indicator worksheet and had him assess where he was at currently. This immediately brought him into the present because he had to look at where he was at and what was going on. I feel like this was a Geshtalt type feeling practice because it kept him in the present moment and gave him a sense of what he wanted and needed. We dug into the feelings of how his career was dominating his life and how he wanted to make more room for other things. I tried to bring a little parts work in when I asked him to number the indicators in order of what he wanted his life and balance to look like and understand that just because one is louder than the other that it doesn’t mean that’s the one that is needed or wanted.
I felt like I learned a lot from this session, but also feel like this session taught me that I have much more to learn as well. Humbling! -
The client I had a session with to practice partswork was an amazing experience that showed me how partswork can be used and its benefits in a session. When I first met with client we took some time before we got into the clients issue to go over what being a practice client meant and what they were agreeing to by being a practice client. I had the client review and sign my disclosure form after I went over a few of the highlights on the form. It was good to take this time with client because it set some expectations not only for the client but for me as well. It gave me the chance to talk to the client about how we may use nature or the gym to work through the session. This opened the clients’ eyes to some other possibilities in my services and let them know that the type of clothing they wore would be important to the session. Taking this time before getting to the issue showed me how important going over my disclosures with client is and the benefits involved.
By disclosing to the client that it was a practice session opened the doors for me at anytime during the session to say that I would like to try something and gave the client a heads up that I would be implementing something into the session. This took a lot of pressure off me and felt like it did the same for the client. During the session I feel like how partswork was implemented was very beneficial. A few of the things I feel like I ran into or that was challenging was how much time we had to work it in. Time was challenging because in an hour session I had to get to the deeper need, explain how partswork works, interviewing the parts we wanted to speak to, implement it, and talk about homework between sessions.
The client I worked with already had an issue to bring to the session which made the timing a little easier to deal with however as we know the issue that the client brings is not usually the deeper need. Helping the client seek the deeper need was so powerful and fun to watch. Not sure that client noticed but on multiple occasion I really wanted to ask closed questions and also bring personal story into the session. It was interesting and almost fun to have these things come in and work through them and still being able to fulfill what the client needed. I did have a personal friendship with the client in previous year which I wasn’t sure if would block anything in the session, I believe that because trust was established the client felt safe being present and disclosing on a deeper level. -
Summary Post
I feel like I know my ideal client and my ideal session. not so much in the way things will unfold but in a way of what it will feel like or look like. But when I try and write out or act out a session it doesn’t feel like I want it to. I feel like my vision is not totally understood, but I am not letting this feeling stop me from moving forward because just like the client experience I know I have very little control. All I know is I have been helping people and guiding them through their process and I am getting some good feedback. This module has helped uncover a lot for me.
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When I think about coaching/guiding I think of being the tool to help someone discover or rather uncover more about themselves. I feel that through coaching we are able to use the coach or guide to help us see what is already there. In my own experience these are things that have been buried deep and don’t necessarily want to be uncovered by the conscious mind and it is only through guidance that they can be seen. I am not sure I have an exact “ideal” population that I want to work with other than what every coach wants….. a willing client. The niche that I want to work in is on the other hand more specific. My nature in the nature connected coaching is going to be more often than not a gym setting. My ideal client will be coming to me with the understanding that we may take the session out onto the gym floor.
An ideal client session for me would be anywhere from 1.5-2 hours long to adequately go through the ceremony. Severance phase would take place in an office setting then threshold and incorporation will take place on the gym floor. As far as goal specific, all I can hope and ask for is that client feel that they made more progress through the session. I can help facilitate the client reaching his or her goals, but also can’t expect that they will be attained every session. However, thinking more about what I feel most of my clientele will be working towards or through would be more emotional therapy in a sense. What I mean is utilizing the gym to work through emotion with a specific goal in mind.
While searching the web I found that there are exercise therapists doing slightly similar work to what I would like to do. The exercise therapists work with clients to become more comfortable with their bodies through exercise. Where I may help a client through body dysmorphia, I want to work with clients through whatever their issue may be; career, family,
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Summary Post
Like I stated in my initial post. Having gone through the threshold experience as the client has given me a lot of insight as to how much care needs to be given when coaching a client through this experience. Care not only when coaching them into but out of as well. There is a lot of energy attached to the threshold experience and I feel that it can be positive as well as negative energy and this makes the planning face that much more crucial.
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The threshold experience for me was interesting because I don’t feel that I exactly trusted that it would work or I would even have an experience at all. The specific threshold experience I had was some anger and fear and I build a structure that resembled a person and then I destroyed it. I felt like I wanted to share what the experience was because it wasn’t the most comfortable thing I have done, and it made me thing that coaching and working on oneself is not always comfortable. We may have a client that really need to be pushed or motivated to “DO SOMETHING” whatever it may be. There also has to be a lot of care that goes into coaching out of the threshold because it is a very volatile time for the client with a lot of emotions floating and formulating. I feel that in my threshold instance nature played the simple role of providing what I needed and provided and open non confining space. The core competencies that I feel are essential to practice in the threshold are creating awareness, active listening, and coaching presence.
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Summary Post
It is nice to know I am not alone in my thoughts. I sometimes get hung up on the fact that I may not understand something or understand it differently than the collective. I have really enjoyed reading everyone’s posts and getting some very positive feedback on my post. I want to thank the group for being so positive and supportive.
This topic was a head scratcher for me as well but in the end I can see how the two co-exist and really rely on one another. Thank you again for everyone’s insight! -
Initial Post
Honestly I struggle with the question t hand a little because two opposing terms come up for me “vast” and “minute”. The world or earth we live in is a vast place probably in my opinion the largest thing we can touch and are a part of in a physical sense. The issues that affect the earth are also a vast concept and a vast problem that is hard to tackle even in the cumulative sense.
When I think of coaching I think of minute or small issues that may seem vast to the individual, don’t get me wrong. We as human’s can only conquer what us right in front of us and even though it may seem like a small feat, it is the small feats that add up to create a bigger more impactful response.
In essence I feel this is how ecopsycology and coaching come together. They both are trying to tackle issues on there own relative scale. Not sure if any of this makes sense, but this is what my mind is showing me. Again a tough concept for me to wrap my head around.
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Summary Post
Foundation 1 has given me a much clearer understanding of how to answer the question of what is it that you do or are wanting to do as a “coach”. When I first came home from our intensive it was hard to formulate what my vision really was and formulate it into a conversation that someone could understand that wasn’t at the intensive. I found it funny when Michael was talking about having the initial discussion with someone in the cohort or out mentor before we start openly talking about the vision. My initial vision made sense to me but was not coming across very clear. So in closing foundation one gave me a better understanding not only for myself of the vision, but made it so that I could explain it to others in a captivating way.
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Ben,
It was interesting reading your entry. Lots came up for me. I feel at time Geshalt comes very natural and other times it feels like I just can’t get there. I know that feeling of being busy but everything is just kind of fitting into place. I love hearing that experimenting is going well in your sessions. I have been feeling that I have been coming up with a lot of the experiments that I want clients to try and want to play a little ore with letting them come up with some possible exercises.
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Lisa,
I have found for myself that establishing that coaching connection/agreement has been very beneficial for my practice. It not only allows me to be at ease in discussing what the client can expect from a session but in them know that we may try new things like take our session outside or into the gym. It also allows the freedom to express some of the differences from possible past therapy type sessions and really let the client identify what they may want or need and some of their expectations. It is hard to put into words what this initial time together does for the client/coach relationship and sets the stage for the session and future sessions. Thank you for talking about your experience with this. -
Brooke I think you are going to be a great guide. It feels like you have a clear grasp of your ideal client an the fact that you really want to focus on those that might have that extra itch about nature but aren’t really sure got me thinking that there is a whole niche in that population.
I also really liked your idea of a small group meeting regularly over a long stretch. I think there are many great possibilities with that!
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Lisa,
I have to say being your coach for this experience was a big part of our first intensive for me. It really gave me a lot of meaning and direction as a coach. I am so glad I got to be there for it. Thank you -
Adriana, I feel that this a simple yet complex question. The more I keep it simple the easier it is for me. Thank you for your post.
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Daniel,
Thank you for your post. Through daily life I have to constantly remind myself that everything is a choice. To make what we learned a reality in my life is a choice. to listen deeper is a choice, and so on. I will be honest it has been hard for me to make my daily practice a priority. But once again being reminded that it is a choice and today life everyday i need to make the decision and put that decision into action.